A year ago on Christmas Day, I became a mother in the back seat of a Volkswagen van.
Yep, that's exactly how it happened except the labor and delivery were not what you normally see on TV (or may have experienced yourself, lol)
It was a rotten miserable overcast day and Matt and I were just about at the end of our ropes. We were homesick, sick of being jerked around, feeling completely taken advantage of at every turn. We were both literally shaking in our boots wondering what the hearing would be like. We had heard so very many horror stories about people being grilled by the judge for HOURS before he would allow the adoption.
Our translator had gone in before us to start greasing the wheels and would come and get us when it was our turn. After about a half hour, we see the judge and her assistant coming around the corner, heading for the restaraunt across the street. It's at this point that Matt is seriously considering jumping out of the van and tackling her, but before he can do that, our translator comes back. Expecting the worst, you can imagine our shock when she said, congratulations, you're officially the parents of Victoria and Natalia.
And that's the story of how I became a mother in the backseat of a VW van- just like that.
Not quite as miraculous as the birth that took place on the same day 2000 plus years ago, but the fact that this was all happening on Christmas Day and that throughout this entire time every time something threatened to derail us, the problem just simply disappeared, was not lost on any of us.
We couldn't take custody of either girl until the ten day waiting period was over and that was another reason for concern because while it was highly unlikely, a family member could have contested the judge's decision and it's very likely Matt and I would have been out of luck.
But that didn't happen either. The worst thing that happened was that we were stuck for the 10 days, plus the 10 days for the shut down for the holidays and then couldn't get tickets out of there until the 19th. Even the 10 1/2 hour trek home with both girls went a lot smoother than I had imagined.
It's been an amazing year watching these two little girls blossom and thrive in our family. Someone said to me the other day, "It's like they have always been here" and in many ways, it does feel like that. I sometimes forget how much they have both had to overcome in just this one year, let alone everything that came before that time.
And I guess that's part of "my" problem. I'm always waiting for the other shoe to drop and you'd think I'd have learned by now that there's nothing I can do about it.
I just read in someone else's blog who's dealing with similar "control" issues "Who died and left me in charge of being in charge of how things turn out"
It's a tough behavior to unlearn- to say the least!!
I know it's been forever since I've posted. The girls are doing great. Vica got her first report card and is doing very well in all of her subjects. EXCEPT the in the listening and following directions department. She seems to um, need improvement in that area.
Sounds just like her Mom, LOL!!!!!! Seriously though, we had a complete Parenting Magazine Moment around here and talked to Vica about it- no yelling, no screaming, no tears- on anyone's part!! But I'll reserve patting myself on the back until the next report card comes out.
We've been dealing with some other behavior issues with Vica- but that's another post for another time and I just don't have the energy to dive into that one right now- although blogging about it really does help me get my brain around things and I usually feel MUCH better afterward. The cyber-therapy will just have to wait. The laundry is threatening to take over here.
The weather has been G-L-O-O-M-Y to say the least. I'll be so happy when February is over.
Next week is Natasha's 5th birthday. I may even post pictures.
Hope all is well with everyone!
Saturday, February 09, 2008
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2 comments:
I'm glad to see you posting again. I hope things are going well. Parenting is definitely a challenge on most days. We're having school issue too at the moment, Ben is the class clown and distracts the other kids as well as himself.....
I would love for you to post pictures.
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